Sick Day.

So I have to admit I was feeling pretty sickly yesterday so I thought I would post the top things that are good about being sick. Though the bad outweigh the good, there is always room for a little optimism in the Land of Ig.

While I just spent 20 minutes writing this the bad news is it deleted. AH! Apparently being sick has caught on to the Internet.

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Here is my lost post…

7. Daytime TV.

Yup, that’s right. It is pretty funny to watch Daytime TV. It is a totally different genre of TV. The filming in shaky, the lighting askew, and the storylines are ridiculous. You can catch up on the ridiculous soap operas and talk shows on TV. My favorites over the many years of being sick have turned out to be: LIVE with Regis and whoever happens to be the co-host at the time, The View, Days of Our Lives, and Judge Judy. When I was younger the OJ Trial was a good one to spend the day watching.

6. The Sofa.

You get the whole couch. Normal people have to share the sofa. But when you’re sick you get it all. Wives, sisters, mothers, and fathers flee the sofa in hopes that you will be more comfortable. What a great situation, you can finally stretch out and enjoy the couch to its fullest.

5. Crackers and Gatorade.

I have to admit I am a big fan of saltine crackers: Premium, Saltine, Krispie Crackers, whatever the brand I do enjoy them. Add a tall glass (or even better a bottle) of Gatorade and I’m a happy guy. While it becomes somewhat monotonous I do enjoy the combo.

4. Back Scratches.

I am a big fan of getting my back scratched. Or my arms, head, or even ankles. Odd? Maybe. But when you are sick you get double the amount of scratches. It is great when you’re sick because you don’t even have to ask, people just come and pat you on the head and if you give a little sigh, they keep going. What a comfort!

3. Control the Remote, Remote Control.

Normally when people come in the room they will complain about shows (see The View) that is on TV. But when you are sick you don’t have to justify your TV choice, nor are you ever asked to change the channel. No, when you’re sick you get the pick of the shows.

2. Complain Away.

You can complain and no one will think “ill” of you. Sometimes you just need a moment to gripe, being sick can give you that opportunity. You don’t even need to make up things to complain about, you can just rant about being ill. Being sick is a good outlet for this need to complain.

1. No Chores.*

Yup, that’s right. When you are sick you get a freebee day. Nothing is expected of you, in fact often you are given the day to give other people chores. It is wonderful to know that when you recover some of your chores won’t be able to be completed. A day off is a wonderful thing.

*Please note, as noted by many observers item number 1 is not generally taken by the female of the species. Unfortunately mothers, wives, and women everywhere are expected to carry on with their duties. Lucky for the Fauf this clause will not apply to her, she will get her sick days and enjoy the luxuries husbands, fathers, and single men across America do.